Placemat Paradox

To each other, we were as normal and nice as the smell of bread. We were just a family. In a family even exaggerations make perfect sense.

John Irving

I've been having a small issue with my table lately....sort of a kitchen conundrum, so to speak. It's not a riveting social issue or even a hotbed political one. Just a small, ordinary problem. Tiny in some ways, but large in other ways that only other mothers would understand. I cried over the place mats. It occurred to me while preparing for dinner, that I only needed to put out two place mats to complete the setting of our table. Four place mats were no longer necessary. My table only needed half a set. My passing thoughts were mixed....thinking that the other two I could put back to use as replacements in case of old age spills (yikes!), the thought that I didn't really need to prepare dinner anymore-we could just have cheese and crackers every night, that I could switch between "bucket, bag or box" takeout for the rest of my life, or that the evening repast would be an endless cycle of chips, slimfast, and old bagels. Somehow, the metaphor hit too close to home. The table looked too empty. Channeling my inner Scarlett O'Hara, I set the table with four place mats. I'm already preparing for spring break and the summer to follow. I know---more is changing at my house than the place mats. When the leaves fall from the trees this fall, the leaves on my table will come down too, but for now, the table's set for four.

Photography Lessons

The Fab Four (and a whole lot more)

February has arrived...the love month as some would call it. In my neck of the woods the white paper snowflakes are slowly turning into pink paper hearts. Words around me spell out: heart, friendship, hugs, and love. Who first taught me about love? As a child, I never remember being without the love of my parents, grandparents, siblings and cousins, so I can't say it was them. Marriage and children of my own has certainly taught me the most about love, but they were not the first. As it happens, the first to really teach me about love were the fab four...or as I like to think of them, the Four I Adore. Richard, Erin, Charlotte and Charles. I was an aunt for many years before I became a mom. I'll never forget the first day I saw Richard...I had just turned 17 six weeks before he was born. From the first moment I saw him, I was hooked. Then came Erin, Charlotte and Charles. With each birth, I was overwhelmed with emotion and the realization that my life was going to be joyously different. I was not only Martha daughter and Martha sister...I was now Aunt. The title changed my life. I.love.being.Aunt. Soon after the Fab Four came the Five Who Arrived . Karen, Graydon, Audrey, Giff and CiCi. It didn't take long for David's nieces and nephews to become mine as well. It continues to be a great joy to me to have these amazing, talented and wonderful children be part of my life. They continue to reveal to me that we are stronger together than we are apart, and even though they may not realize it, they provide connections that strengthen, enrich and ground me to my past and future. Jessica and Kelley, you are the Two Who Were New. Thanks for becoming family to my brother and siblings to Charlotte and Charles. You are wonderful additions to my life, and I don't think of you as new any longer. Don't worry, Brett, I didn't forget you. You make me realize that love is always changing and reconfiguring our lives and always to be open to new possibilities. Thanks for keeping my brother young at heart and loving my girls. You are the Plus One More. Lastly, a new chapter in aunting. I call these The Six in the Mix. Ross, Sarah, Caleb, Seth, Addy and Ansley. You are the new template for what is to come. I can't wait to see who will follow on your heels. I don't know exactly what to wait for, but I do know who I have to thank for making me love whatever it will be....the Four I Adore, the Five Who Arrived, the Two Who Were New, the Plus One More, and the Six in the Mix. Thank you for being my first true loves.

Bookends

Happy New Year! It's hard to believe that a new year has circled 'round again. I guess life really is a rhythm. It's surprising to me that I'm just starting to get a perspective on it at age 52. I think I have spent most of my life waiting for it to be different somehow. I've been "musing" (at this point I hate to call it thinking!) about the old and the new, beginnings and endings, and the endless restarting of life in general. I have a new year's resolution....I'd like to become more like Anna, the prophetess in the Bible. She waited at the temple for 84 plus years to proclaim the arrival of the Messiah. When she recognized Jesus, she joyfully proclaimed it to the assembled people. I wonder how many people listened to an old woman, especially one who had been widowed for 84 years. I wonder how Mary felt when she heard Anna's words. Mary, so different from Anna, a young mother who had brought her first baby to the temple, and who kept things close in her heart and pondered them. I think I would have liked Anna. I think I might have liked her style. I know I want to learn to wait with expectancy and proclaim with joyful spontaneity. Mary and Anna...weak and unimportant to the culture around them..... strong and empowered women who knew the plans God had for them. Bookends to the greatest story ever told, and witnesses to the greatest life ever lived. So, I'm thinking who are my bookends? Who are the strong, empowered women who are the witnesses to my life? Who are your bookends? Write and let me know....I'm interested.

Kate's month!

This is a photograph of Kate and Dr. Deborah Norin-Kuehn, Kate's voice teacher at Heidelberg University. This photo was taken at Kate's senior recital on November 12, 2011. Dr. N-K has been Kate's teacher, mentor and friend for the past four years. She helped to develop Kate's voice, her talent and her spirit. Dr. N-K supported Kate's departure from the field of music education and into the business field. Dr. N-K helped her meld her love of music and the arts with her drive and passion to make the arts accessible to all people. Dr. N-K suggested to Kate that she might want to apply for the development internship at Music Academy of the West in Santa Barbara, California. Kate had an amazing summer experience as the advancement intern at the Music Academy. As a parent, and as a teacher, I am so thankful for dedicated educators like Dr. N-K. I am so very thankful that Kate and Dr. N-K will be friends always. (A selection from Kate's senior recital http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KboKYKDWP8c&feature=related)

This is a picture of the Alumni Choir-Summit Choral Society, November 26, 2011.

Kate sang with this choir for 10+ years. I was the choir manager for 6 of those years. These past choir members have come together to sing once again at the Candlelight Christmas Concerts this holiday season. It would be remiss of me not to mention the tremendous impact Dr. Frank and Arlene Jacobs have had (and continue to have) on Kate and her life. Frank and Arlene are two amazing and inspirational teachers, musicians and mentors. I thank them for giving my child a very special place in their hearts. (www.summitchoralsociety.org)

Frank and Arlene doing what they do best....watching rehearsal!

Molly's Month!

This is Molly's month! November belongs to Kate! Molly is a freshman at Otterbein University (Westerville, OH) this fall majoring in environmental sustainability with a minor in dance. She is a defender for the women's soccer team. We are excited because the Cardinals are in second place in the playoffs. This Thursday they will play either Baldwin-Wallace College or John Carroll University in Westerville. David will be traveling down to watch, but as the game begins at 2:00, I will stay home and work. ( Someone has to pay the tuitions (yikes!) and put dog food in the bowls!) This fall Molly pledged Sigma Alpha Tau (O.W.L.S) and now is a "little hooter." It has been so much fun to travel and see her games, meet her friends (and their parents), and enjoy the wonderful little downtown of Westerville. Molly, we love you, we miss you, and we are so happy for you.

Journeys

Labor Day, 2011

It's rainy and cool today....seems like fall is in the air. I've been thinking a lot about this blog entry and what I wanted to say....the pictures I would post, quotes I would use, funny ideas about school and jokes about teaching for the twenty eighth year in a row...stuff like that. But the truth is lately I have been thinking about journeys. It seems like everyone is on a journey these days. My sister-in-law, Ann, and my daughter Molly, seem to exemplify this to me. Ann is currently hiking the Camino in Spain ( http://www.santiago-compostela.net/) The Camino is 450 miles of backpacking and biking trails. Traditionally, it is a spiritual walk that dates back to the Middle Ages. She is hiking to raise money and awareness for Opportunity International. She left last week and will be gone for another five. Steven walked with her the first week, but now he is on his way back home. As her prayer partner, I lift her up daily and carry her in my heart as she traverses rain, slugs, muddy boots and the joy of a simple meal shared with fellow travelers.

Molly is on another kind of journey, but a similar one all the same. She left two weeks for her freshman year at Otterbein University. She tried out for the soccer team, helped her roommate deal with a severely broken leg, navigated the world of schedule changes, sorted through her dance placement and negotiated new friendships all in two weeks. She started with our help, but was soon left to deal on her own. She, too, is making her way through her own pilgrimage into life as an adult. Lastly, my thoughts turn to Kate. She is getting ready to finish a journey...she will graduate in May and plans to move on to graduate school. David and I are beginning the journey of a life with no children at home. None of these experiences are unique to us. Our stories will join those who came along before us and who will surely come after us. After all, life isn't a destination. It is a series of Stops Along the Way...